Bold of you to assume Mike isn’t paying for the privilege.

That’s a fair point. It could just be incompetence. It’s concerning that it’s hard to tell the difference.

It also makes me think his entourage has selected Newsom as their top choice for controlled opposition.

Oh, no, not quite. That was severe understatement on my part. In most English-speaking countries, when a person embodies the pejoratives you’ve listed, we refer to them as a “trump.”

Quite. I’m not one much predisposed to negative talk, but I really must say that this Trump fellow may be a bit of a cad.

Even when possible, it’s often inadvisable as we learned from the monkapotamus in Drew Carey’s famous documentary: https://youtu.be/BLbJC7LeC8E

Scientist 1: “How are things coming along with our test subjects?”

Scientist 2: “I don’t know, it’s about time to check back in with them.”

Scientist 2: “Hey, Mike? How’s it going?”

Mike: “Not too bad. There have been some challenges, but I think we got a few things worked out.”

Scientist 2: “Oh…my. was that it’s–”

Mike: “No, I don’t think so, but it seems like it was mutually enjoyable, though, so write that down.”

[Trilling noises in the background]

Ain’t no good prokaryote 'cept one that’s enslaved or dead. Those freaky little bastards don’t even have organelles or a nucleus. MRSA, Botulism, Anthrax…we’ve been at war for billions of years. Long will I have been in the cold, cold ground before I recognize prokaryote rights.

That’s why I only eat prokaryotes.

Dendrologists: [heavy breathing]

In all seriousness, isn’t it pretty unlikely that alien life could interbreed with terran life even if they also used DNA with the same bases?

(War) h’uh

Yeah!

(What is it good for?)

Absolutely (nothin) uh-huh, uh-huh

(War) h’uh

Yeah!

(What is it good for?)

Absolutely (nothin’)

Say it again, y’all

(War) h’uh (h’uh) look out!

(What is it good for?)

Absolutely (nothin’)

I had not considered the possibility that the bear was more horny than hungry.

Is running from a bear a good strategy? I’m no expert, but they seem a lot faster.

They had experience in primary school. This next round is going to be fully illiterate.

I may have walked into that one, but I have to commend you for your witty ribaldry. Shakespeare would approve.

Because I’m not as smart as I hoped I would be by now. How’s it feel conversing with internet strangers who are too dumb to decide whether quinoa or queso would go better on a sandwich? Huh, mister smart guy? Not so tuff now that I’m asking the hard questions are you?

You forgot the quinoa.